Problem: Many of the greatest culinary options (including but not limited to: chicken nuggets, an entire loaf of bread by itself, 6 to 7 churros, etc) available to an office worker in Midtown Manhattan are available at inhospitable locations. Namely: at Wendy’s, at McDonald’s, from food carts, in the Duane Reade ice cream aisle. These disgustingly fulfilling foods are sold in places where you can’t and/or don’t want to eat them. And you can’t bring them back to your desk because then everyone would know.
Solution: Rentable shamepods available to those who want to eat an embarrassing lunch. $5 for 20 minutes, and we can set them up in Grand Central Station or Bryant Park. They will be like school desks with the chairs attached, but inside of bathroom stalls — with open bottoms and tops — so as to at least discourage masturbation. But let’s face it, shame is shame and some people are just going to go for it.