June 2010
1 tag
“As Jeffrey Hicks, the event safety coordinator for the Renaissance Festival...”
– Brad Taylor, Iowa City, IA. Runner Up in the Bulwer-Lytton Fiction Contest (for bad writing) in the category of “Vile Puns.” But first place on my personal, aortically-located leaderboard (which ranks AMAZING PUNS). Read it aloud a few times; you’ll get it and be amazed.
“that gaga song is pretty good.”
– BRTE Nick
Hey, posterity!
1 tag
fictionalhistories asked: I know, I know. This totally falls under "Getting Crazy." But I'm pretty sure we should be, like, BFFs. And as your would-be BFF, this is the sort of thing I have to tell you no matter what.
So...
You in?
So...
You in?
1 tag
Take this (new) job and LOVE it
I no longer have to worry about #shitmyboss says! Sorry to
companies that wanted me as CFO, better luck next time!
1 tag
Heat Day!!
Broken AC means work is canceled! I am going to make heatmen out of all the accumulating heat! And heat angels (this is means me passing out on the subway due to heat stroke and falling onto the tracks).
Suggested out of office replies, by Jen, our lady of post-its:
Our office is closed for the day due to being ON FIRE Our office is closed for the day because, even though we have a...
1 tag
1 tag
Grownin' up iz hard 2 doo.
When I was growing up, my family had close friends that lived in Texas. Despite our huge physical distance (it’s clear from my egregious online accent that I’m from Massachusetts, right? It’s wicked embarrassing), we saw them frequently. My parents were the godparents to their son and we related to one another like family, especially the daughter and me. I’m an only child,...
1 tag
2 tags
1 tag
taking the merit out of meritocracy
Today, a large number of people in my office and another publishing-related office in the building received copies of The Overton Window, Glenn Beck’s new novel. These copies were delivered with no accompanying note, which is not entirely uncommon but not entirely standard, implying perhaps that they spoke for themselves. This seems to me to be tantamount to taking a picture of a sizable,...
Craigslist: Ghostwriter / Personal Assistant /... →
“Skills required: Superb writer, previous ghostwriting experience a plus High energy, good mood Excellent computer skills, email, blogs, photos (Mac preferable) Great at scheduling and making travel arrangements, loves to travel Would love to spend up to a year in beautiful Hawaii No smoking, drinking or drugs”
Ghostwriting for some rich old dude’s dating profiles. Why...
I’m watching Cold Case, and thinking that the weirdest TV trope is, in detective-style shows, when people tell their story to the investigator in flashback, they tell it in a suspenseful narrative form and leave the ending ambiguous, leading the investigator to declare something that sums up the situation, such as “So, it was the magician that was pregnant,” or “so, your...
1 tag
Blogging about dreams is like dancing about...
Last night I had a dream that I was dating a really well-disguised Venus Fly-trap (it was one of those dream things where he actually looked like Eric from Work of Art*, but everyone knew he was a Venus Fly-trap except for me except I also did know — dreams!). When I would introduce him to my friends they would say, “Ummmm, Meredith, I think your new boyfriend is a really...
2 tags
“The Absence of God,” Rilo Kiley.
...
2 tags
Funny Translator (on Representative Joe Barton) →
Jen showed me the Funny Translator (admittedly in need of a snappier name) this morning after a particularly incomprehensible piece of slush, but I was hoping we could use this powerful machinary for good: turning appalling statements into meaningful sentiments.
Therefore:
“I think it’s a tragedy of the first proportion that a private corporation can be subjected to what I...
1 tag
What's in a name? In this case, the juice of...
Dearest Spell Check,
I thought we were on the same team. We both get unnecessarily aggravated when people make simple mistakes, and we both frequently overlook things that should be our responsibility. If I had the capacity to underline things I didn’t like or recognize (one and the same!) you know that I would mark this world up. But now you try to tell me that my last name isn’t a...
2 tags
Jezebel: The Daily Show's Woman Problem →
There is no joy in Mudville.
1 tag
I don't have a Politics minor because I love...
Number of hours since I decided I should know more about the world and be politically engaged: 16.
Number of rage blackout since I decided I should know more about the world and be politically engaged: 37-38, and one panic attack.
Solutions I have discussed and abandoned since I decided I should know more about the world and be politically engaged: mandatory population control, colonization of...
“In some ways, Huckabee seems like a promising candidate for 2012…”
– Ariel Levy, “Prodigal Son, “The New Yorker
I know that she means because that is when the election is, but I was definitely thinking about the doomsday 2012 in which case, yes! Such a good candidate for that! This article is a must read; between this, the McChrystal and the article...
2 tags
I want to be a Tami Taylor.
Watching the scene in Friday Night Lights where Landry drives with Tyra, her mom, her sister and Matt’s grandma has made me realize how castrating my mere presence must be. My whole life is a cramped car sing-along to Lady Marmalade.
1 tag
Put that in your wheelhouse and smoke it.
I like to say that my Tumblr is all about Lady Gaga and the hundreds of cats I will someday own (when really it’s viral marketing for Netflix streaming, open your eyes people), but it’s actually a true thing that the heavily favored subjects of my Twitter are Criminal Minds, my own breasts, and jam.
2 tags
1 tag
1 tag
Super stoked to watch beltway gossip fight...
(via savingpaper)
1 tag
1 tag
Boerum Hill Shake Shack?!?! →
Dear God,
If you make this happen I will stop telling strangers’ children that there is no you and I will give up my seat on the subway for elderly people instead of pretending to be pregnant.
Hugs,
Meredith
1 tag
1 tag
“Foolish Games,” Jewel.
Sometimes I...
1 tag
1 tag
“A, I couldn’t give the love I intended to give, so the fault is mine if there is...”
– A break-up text from the fading away European gentleman who is the object of affection in this week’s Sex Diary. While splitting up with a dude, I’ve had seriously lousy things said to me, and said seriously lousy things to others, but “Good luck to us both” bums me out in...
1 tag
3 tags
Breaking: Severely Anorexic Woman has Terrible... →
“She’s the worst. She’s the worst. Talk about setting the women’s movement back a...”
– Chelsea Handler, on Gloria Allred in The New York Times. Which is funny because this is usually what I say about Chelsea Handler (or specifically, “She’s bad for women, she’s bad for comedy, she’s bad for women who like comedy and comedy that likes women.”).
As for...
“Mr. Bol, who, it can be safely said, was the only NBA player to have killed a...”
– Washington Post Obit for Manute Bol, who has died at age 47. I know negative things about sports (as in the things I do know are incorrect or made up, and are actually worse than knowing nothing) but I know that Manute Bol was a humanitarian and all around (and all up, up, up) good dude, and that...
1 tag
Anonymous asked: hello Meredith, this is felix morelo. just saying hellos!!!
In the midst of life, we are in debt, etc: What it... →
A really, really great entry about sexual harassment in publishing. And that’s all I’m saying.
