May 2013
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I have a nice personality and I know sweaters.
– Finally removed this weird reference to the movie Alice, a movie I didn’t even really like, from my OKCupid self-summary. Feels good, feels good.
The Annotated Wisdom of Amy Poehler | Splitsider →
Invaluable.
Last night I had a dream that I accidentally became part of a terrorist cell because I stopped taking any kind of extra money from my parents for things like haircuts or train tickets home. In the dream all I did was cry and cry, because I wanted to give myself over to the FBI but no one would call 911 for me. When my alarm went off the first thing I realized was that I could have called 911...
Throwing someone’s phone across a room and then writing a column calling them “vulgarians” “of a certain age” is some next level Aaron Sorkin bullshit. I’m assuming this is a partisan-flipped The Newsroom viral marketing scheme.
I’m good at talking to people about what they’re interested in instead of...
– josemoran28 (via adultbecause)
Oh god, do I have to learn how to do this. I haven’t had a conversation that I didn’t steer back to fried chicken, Parks and Recreation, Adulting, boys or myself in months. But I’m so good at talking about myself and my interests!
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adulting:
I loved the Book Giveaway entries (winners coming tomorrow!) so much that I couldn’t stand letting them languish in an old post. So here is the new project; eventually, I hope to have all 900+ entries up. Check it out, submit, go crazy! adultbecause.com
!!!
Lost my voice last Thursday and I've been getting...
New vocal beauty regimen: screaming and cigarettes.
No Dudes Allowed Reading List 2013: Chapter 5
lilitmarcus:
It’s almost halfway through the year, and I’m continuing my project of only reading books by female authors. The big development this time is that I finally got a Kindle and it has definitely upped the amount that I read while traveling. You can read previous installments here.
13. Kelly Williams Brown, Adulting
A couple of weeks ago, my friend Meredith gave me this book to read....
The emotional upshot of the penultimate episode of The Office uses the exact same stupidly on-the-nose device as the final moments of the Twilight series, and how did people know how to feel things before sweetly-scored montages?
FAQs
“Can you get me a sodaaaaaaa?”
“Do we have to walk?”
“When are we eating?”
“Whose voice is that? Ty Burrell?”
“HOW IS IT ONLY 11 AM?”
“What, like Kanye?”
“DRINKS?”
“I fell down? Where?… When?”
Dear Telephone,
I am always saying, “Yayyy!!!!” I am never saying “Tatty!!!!”
Love, Meredith
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I am writing an update of Alanis Morrissette's...
Adulting: How to Become a Grown-up in 468... →
staff:
One of our Tumblr favorites is now a book! Congratulations, Kelly. :)
Join us in NY tomorrow night to celebrate and hear tales of failure from grown-ups like our own Caragh Poh.
One good thing about professional success is when everyone starts joking that they will be nice to you now.
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Flavorwire: 'Adulting' Author Kelly Williams... →
“Stay away from people who have significant others. Yes, I know — You get to be a blonde, futuristic-haired wrecking ball! Fun! Boom! Explosions! Walking away without looking over your shoulder! — but Jessa, there are lots of parts of you that are good. And so many men who aren’t in love with someone else. Aim your tornado self toward those particular trailer parks.”
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Adulting Step 18 (Vine): Buy toilet paper in bulk.
SUCK it, little girl.
– Things I Just Said Really Loudly at Work that Adult Women Probably Should Not Say Really Loudly at Work
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A Geech With Kelly Williams Brown
Kelly: I think it’s also important, when you ask someone out
to be really fucking clear about your intentions.
Me: YES
Kelly: Like, the whole reason you are finding this bravery within yourself is because you can’t bear to not know.
Me: “Hey, maybe we could get together to talk about a project” is not a date
Kelly: So don’t water that down by writing something that could be interpreted as just friendly.
“Hey, my roommates and I are having a party on Saturday” — also not a date.
me: “Hey, awesome seeing you Saturday. Any interest in getting a drink sometime?” Date!
Kelly: Date!
Me: “Hey, awesome seeing you Saturday. I might be in the neighborhood this weekend, let me know if you’re around.” Nooooot a date.
Kelly: Not a date.
Asking someone out on a date should contain a call to action. The more specific, the better.
“Hey, it was great seeing you Saturday. Want to grab a drink after work this Friday?”
Me: Genius. Totally a date.
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Like learning how to be a grown-up but hate reading? Watch the wonderful Kelly Williams Brown, author of Adulting: How to Become a Grown-Up in 468 Easy(ish) Steps on AM Northwest, and glean as much as you can!
For more, stop hating reading because that is a terrible position to take, and buy the book, OUT TOMORROW.
Today actually IS a really proud day...
But also it is not: I just filled out 6 pages of information to be informed that a gift card has $4.99 on it. And then I asked the question, “Do you think the dollar pizza place takes credit cards?”
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I just looked up all the last names of all the...
Adam Sackler Ray Ploshansky Charlie Dattolo Elijah Krantz
This has been a public service announcement.
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Is there a way on Facebook where you can not unfriend or block someone, but hide them from yourself so you can’t look them up?
Laziest asshole wants to hire you to do his online... →
jhermann:
lieslieslies:
Stumbled across this ad today posted by a “successful entrepreneur” who is too goddamn lazy to browse the dating sites he belongs to. Basically, he wants a smart and attractive woman to go through the sites, favorite potential dates according to his list of standards, then he’ll delete the favorites he doesn’t like, and then you’ll do the messaging and date planning!...
If you have a handlebar mustache, that is pretty much all you are. You are a...
– Marc Maron
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WSJ: New Books Offer Life Lessons for Starter... →
A handful of comedic guides to being in your 20s come out in time for graduation season. Interviews with Kelly Williams Brown, Iris Smyles and Alida Nugent.
Sorry already guys, but for the next week or so this is JUST a Kelly Williams Brown fan blog. LOOK AT MY GIRL THERE.
Is this the most sexist TV programme in history?... →
Creator of Danish show which critiques women’s naked bodies with derogatory comments insists it is doing women a favour because the ‘female body thirsts for the words of a man’
I never thought I’d want to burn all the televisions.