May 20, 2013
Before we went in the 7-11 I said I was going to only get a water. Now I own this.

Before we went in the 7-11 I said I was going to only get a water. Now I own this.

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May 17, 2013
Perfect jean jacket weather.

Perfect jean jacket weather.

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Two lemons? Shameful lush.

Two lemons? Shameful lush.

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May 16, 2013
“ I have a nice personality and I know sweaters.
Finally removed this weird reference to the movie Alice, a movie I didn’t even really like, from my OKCupid self-summary. Feels good, feels good. •
The Annotated Wisdom of Amy Poehler | Splitsider

Invaluable.

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interweber: I made this and it is good, I think.  This is good. I am feeling C-.

interweber:

I made this and it is good, I think. 

This is good. I am feeling C-.

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Nouveau Elevator: Escalator division: A Play in One Act “What kinds of elevators do you specialize in?” “Escalators.” “… I like your style.”

Nouveau Elevator: Escalator division: A Play in One Act

“What kinds of elevators do you specialize in?”

“Escalators.”

“… I like your style.”

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Last night I had a dream that I accidentally became part of a terrorist cell because I stopped taking any kind of extra money from my parents for things like haircuts or train tickets home. In the dream all I did was cry and cry, because I wanted to give myself over to the FBI but no one would call 911 for me. When my alarm went off the first thing I realized was that I could have called 911 myself, so I tried to go back to sleep so that I could turn myself in, but I failed, and the day has basically gone from there.

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Throwing someone’s phone across a room and then writing a column calling them “vulgarians” “of a certain age” is some next level Aaron Sorkin bullshit. I’m assuming this is a partisan-flipped The Newsroom viral marketing scheme.

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